Every time I think M is ready to walk somewhere alone, she misses a car.

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I talked to Moe earlier.  The overwhelming sadness is well - overwhelming - and very in my face.  She said I wasn't doing my job, that I wasn't protecting the one little.  I told her she was wrong.  That I was letting her spend quite a bit of time out and letting her know that life is safe now, catering to her wants and needs as much as possible.  She said that I am hurting her.  I said no, that I am helping her heal.  That holding all of that inside is hurting her.

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It bothers me that I can't get a picture of what all of that is like I can with so many other memories.  The outline of those moments in my brain is so vague that I can't even piece it together except in the most basic understanding.

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M seems less sad.  I think she is in that place before you realize you are less sad, before you recognize that there is hope and an end in sight.