M and I talked for a bit.  It is hard, sometimes, to not react when every fiber of my being aches for her and wants to fix whatever is wrong, or whatever.  The talking is good and I know she needs me to not react.  She shared a poem with me and I reminded her she would get past this, that life would be better later.  Mostly she is just hurting and scared that life wil never hold joy again and though I can tell her it will, I know what it feels like to not be able to see that for yourself.  Truthfully, though I would never tell her this, it is just words for me right now.  Words that I tell her and myself because I know they are the right words but I don't believe them any more than she does. 



We talked about her not wanting to need counseling and I compared that to me not wanting to call a mechanic when I don't know how to fix a car or not wanting to call a dr when otc meds aren't fixing a problem.  She gets it.  She doesn't like it, but she gets it.  I think that will have to be good enough for now.